Weird things from Uncle John’s Slightly Irregular Bathroom Reader(and some facts from my math class, yesterday. Also, Ponui can use these. Also, the views of the people don’t reflect my personal views. :) )


Here’s the random fact from my math class that we used for a bar graph/histogram: Most kids in my class like Fritos more than Doritos, Sun Chips, and other things.

Now, Uncle John thingsies:

Some Real Hong Kong Translated Into English Subtitles

*I scare nothing! Even you become napkins! *Fat head! Look at you! You’re full of cholesterol! *The tongue is so ugly. Let’s imagine it to be Tom Cruise. *It took my seven digestive pills to dissolve your hairy crab!(Zarion here. How did that guy swallow a crab? Did he swim inside of an aquarium?) *Dance the lion for others for just some stinking money! It’s like razing my brows with the kung-fu I taught you! *Alternatively, you must follow my advice whenever I say “maltose”! *If you nag on, I’ll strangle you with chewing gum. *A red moon? Why don’t you say “blue buttocks”? *Watch out! The road is very sweaty! *A poor band player I was, but now I am crocodile king.

Real-Life Bumper Stickers

*Where am I going, and why am I in this handbasket? *I love defenseless animals-especially in a good gravy!  *I’m multitalented: I can talk and annoy you at the same time! *D0 they ever shut up on your planet? *Therapy is expensive;popping bubble wrap is cheap! You choose. *I brake for no apparent reason. *Honk if you’ve never seen an Uzi fired from a car window! *Try not to let your mind wander-it’s too small to be let out by itself! *Politicians and diapers need to be changed-often for the same reason! *Whose cruel idea was it for the word LISP to have the letter “S” in it?  *My wife keeps complaining that I never listen to her-or something like that! *Caution:I drive like you do *I’ll bet you a new car that I can brake faster than you can! *Boycott shampoo! Demand real poo! *Everyone has a right  to be stupid. Some just abuse the privilege. *Bad cop, no donut. (Apparently, there’s a joke that policemen eat donuts on duty.) *I’m not a complete idiot-some parts are missing! *If you don’t like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk. *On the other hand, you have different fingers. *Question reality *Preserve nature;pickle a squirrel *Stop staring at my bumper, you pervert!  *Four out of five voices in my head say, “Kill!” *If I throw a stick, will you leave?

Two disgusting, REAL poems from the 1800s about a sadistic kid named Willie

#1 Willie saw some dynamite,

Couldn’t understand it quite;

Curiosity never pays:

It rained Willie seven days

#2 Into the family drinking well

Willie pushed his sister Nell.

She’s there yet

because it kilt her.

Now we have to buy a filter.

Ahh, irregular and weird, isn’t it? Now, here’s one bonus thing before I sign off for the day!(Bla haha! Sorry, it’s hard to control the vampretzel urges.)

My Review of Spider-Man 2 in 5 Words

Awesome m0vie of cool proportions!


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