Are you a bored, tired chicken? Do you have trouble laying your eggs? Do you look like this poor slob?
"I'm Marvin, and I can't lay my eggs properly. Help!!!"
Then, you need Doctor Van Ponypants’s new, INCREDIBLE machine.
"I am Dr. Van Rooster. We couldn't afford Dr. Van Ponypants for this advertisement, and Zarion was too lazy to change what he had written."
The machine consists of a giant, robotic, android fist pounding the test subject in order to force the unwilling egg out.
"I'm Marvin, and I feel happy now, knowing that I have a safe way of getting my eggs out."
And, as a bonus, you get two GIANT FEET!!
Note: We are not responsible in any way, shape or form, for any damage that may occur to your chicken. This consists of being maimed, beheaded, killed, eaten, or hurt in any other way.
Just call 1-800-Chicken-Squasher today! (Buyers Beware: If you cannot find this number, check in the Yellow Pages under the section called This Is Not Real.
Zarion out.
I hate that advertisement.
Hi Zarion.
LOL, Really Zarion?