Green Thumb’s Column: Chihuahuas who get really mad at you, because of your last column, and put you in the hospital


Do I really (Ouch!) need to explain in more detail?

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10 Things You Never Knew About Zarion


10. His fear of heights.

9. He once ate butter raw.

8. Once, he made a fanfiction Arthur story. (Arthur, as in the cartoon.)

7. How far away his home planet is.

6. He likes pie.

5. And Hershey’s bars with caramel.

4. He likes to dance….his own way.

3. Zarion Kreena’s middle names are Arcreek and Berry.

2. He once ate a spider. On accident. (This is under debate. He was three, and it was at night. It could have been a dust bunny.)

1. He DEFINITELY swallowed a rubber head from those yellow rubber people toys.

Tigerboy out.

Song Parody: ‘Some Mysterious Author’


Firstly, this is a deleted song from the Phineas and Ferb movie. Secondly, as is my custom, the original lyrics.

Candace: Let me explain, though it might seem strange to you
So please refrain from thinkin’ bad of me
It gives me pain when I see what my brothers do
But no one else ever can see

I just want the truth known, so I call mom on the phone
But by the time she gets here, the whole thing disappears
Whatever they build every day, it gets taken away
No one sees it, of course, it’s some mysterious force

To my mother every story’s preposterous
Never believes no matter what I do
But though I’m right and she’s wrong, I must confess
I’d probably think I’m crazy, too

I just want the truth known, so I call mom on the phone
But by the time she gets here, the whole thing disappears
Whatever they build every day, it gets taken away
By some mysterious force, no one sees it, of course

Candace and Stacy: Some mysterious force
Some mysterious force
Some mysterious force
Some mysterious force.

See? Isn’t it stuck in your head? Anyway, here’s my parody. Preseeeee-senting……..”Some Mysterious Author!” Enjoy!

Zarion: Let me explain, though it might be strange to you

So please refrain from thinkin’ bad of me

It gives me pain when I see that Ponui is missing

and new blog posts can never be seen

 

I just want the truth known, so I call Ponui on the phone

But I never get an answer, and my hopes of new posts disappear

Whatever I dream every day, gets cruelly taken away,

I never see new entries, of course, it’s some mysterious author

 

To my friends, the whole story’s preposterous

Ponui will never make new posts no matter what I do

But even though people laugh when I say I am right, I must confess

I’d probably think I’m wrong, too

 

I just want the truth known, so I call Ponui on the phone

But I never get an answer, and my hopes of new posts disappear

Whatever I dream every day, gets cruelly taken away,

It’s some mysterious author, I never see some new entries, of course

Zarion and Tigerboy: Some mysterious author

some mysterious author

some mysterious author

some mysterious author.

THE END

Ta-daa! Seriously, though, PONUI??? WHERE ARE YOU??????

 

Odd Parodies


I have been thinking. There’s just some commercials with jingles that are just asking to be parodied. For instance, ”┬áSave big money at Menards!” The corporation is just asking for someone like me to substitute some words other than “big.” For instance…….

*Save no money at Menards!

*Get bad products at Menards!

*Get mugged by someone at Menards!

*Buy flimsy furniture at Menards!

Etc, etc, etc. Now, for a slightly different parody…..

“Splorch, splorch! Goo pets! Splanch, splanch, Goo pets! Goo pets make nothing fun!”

ZArion out.

Contest for The Readers of Miscellaneous Soup


Hi! We, Tigerboy and I, are badly in need of new ideas. At a meeting session for new game shows, we had plenty of plans, but not enough cash! So, we’re doing the cheapskate way and starting a contest!

Game Show Ideas...

1. Think of game show idea. MUST BE within a budget of approximately nothing.

2. Send the more dangerous weapons to this location:

2019 Bookworm Drive

Fantasy Land, 12-of-Never-ville

Why, you ask? Tigerboy lives there, occasionally. He can handle the rabid wolverines. Actually, I- Sorry, no time for chit-chat.

3. Idea must be so bizarre, that no sane network executive would use it in real life. Or, the idea could be a parody. (Ex (This one can not be used): Are You More Dangerous Than A Pack Of Rabid Chihuahuas?)

4. Don’t send yourself in. It’s not cool. The last person who did that (cough, cough: TYRONE TURKEY) accidentally fell into Tigerboy’s acid pit. Seriously, why do you even have one of those. You don’t want to know.

Okay, well that basically wraps things up. Enter, enter, enter! The deadline is “Until We Get Enough Ideas To Work With Our Budget of A Piece of Cardboard, Pocket Link, and Two Nickels Some Hobo Found For Us In The Air Vent”. Thanks, Some Hobo! You’re welcome.

Zarion, Tigerboy, and no one else (Awww…..) are out.