Saturday Night Live Season 38, Episode 3: Daniel Craig, Muse: Debates, Big Bird, And Murder

Zarion: I’m feeling better from Deadpool’s attack. I never knew until now that comic books can be stuffed so far into your throat.

Tigerboy: And I am back.

Zarion: Conveniently gone. You could have done something. You and Deadpool both have healing factors. Anyway, it’s time to review the Saturday Night Live. You can find my predictions here or on this link. They go to the same page, anyway. Finally, in exchange for not sueing, Deadpool has agreed to leave the studio.

Deadpool: I’m not leaving. I want to review. If Daniel Way can leave my series and make it be cancelled, Daniel Craig can make chimichangas.

Zarion: That doesn’t make any sense.

Deadpool: I know I’m in a comic book, dude. Anyway, I’m going to promote myself. GO ON I don’t run the site, but it’s all about me. Also, buy my video game and see my movie, if it ever comes out. @REALDEADPOOL, peeps! (jumps out the window)

Zarion: Great….Anyway, let’s do some reviewing. As usual, Tigerboy will give a short summary of the sketch while I describe it and judge the appropriateness.

Tigerboy: Don’t you think you should update your predictions, after the events of the debate?

Zarion: Okay. We still have 2 hours and 12 minutes until it airs. I’ll put it in a separate post. For now, we’ll just wait and watch the recorded iCarly episode with Jimmy Fallon, Rachel Dratch, and Tina Fey. It’s called “iShock America”, and I’ll make a yet another post reviewing that.

Host: Daniel Craig

Why He’s Hosting:  Skyfall, a James Bond.

Musical Guest: Muse

Why They’re Playing: No idea. An album, maybe? I should just stop running this portion of the blog.

Cold Opening- “Presidential Debate” Is that Chris Parnell playing Jim Lear? It sounds like him. So far, my predictions are coming true. Yeah, I’m right. It is Chris Parnell! Hooray for Chris Parnell! I watched the debate, so this is pretty accurate, not to mention funny. Jason Suidikis’s “Angry Face” is funny. “So then, your plan is just to hire teachers?” “And three outright lies..” That last quote was from Mitt Romney. Yay! Barack Obama forgetting his anniversary…that’s funny.  “Mitt Romney has just said that he killed Osama Bin Laden. Would you like to respond?” “No, go ahead.” Yay! Now Jim Lear’s thoughts. Jay Pharoah is falling asleep…THis is excellent. “For Michelle and girls…Sasha and other one.” Saturday Night Live is finally getting good. Oh, the f-bomb. Oh, well. Still good. A

Monologue: I like his British accent. Funny joke. Yup. James Bond mention. “There’s Sean Connery…they’re all great.” Yay! A tribute to the people he’s killed in his movies. “For All The People I Done Killed” “When you shoot a propane barrell, as you all know, the kill high is great. Cory Alverez? That’s funny. What’s up with the fog? “Gary, I’ll kill you later.” This is excellent. “The Dog Who Saw Too Much.” A

**Side Note: There’s a commercial for Skyfall. I saw that coming.

Construction Workers: This is funny so far. Eww…dirty jokes. Ewwwww…..I hate this. I am only impressed by Daniel Craig’s accent. “I’ve got complaints that you’re heckling people, and one of you is really bad at it.” I hate this sketch. Flashback. HAHAHAHA! He was shot. Okay, that alone makes the rating go up. D+.

Complete Bond Series: This is funny. The second person sounds like Kristen Wiig. Okay, now they’re just making up movie names. The person playing Ellen Degeneres is funny. Whoever is playing Penny Marshall is funny. “52,600 missiles…” B+

A Look Back At The Obama Debate Disaster: “The Worst Thing That Ever Happened Anywhere.” Funny. Yay, Kenan Thompson! Yay, Jason Suedikis as Chris Mathews! Let’s hope his impression is as good as Darrell Hammond’s. OKay, it is. “Buh, Buh, Buh- You’re wrong.” Stock footage of Mitt Romney making a mistake. Slow motion. Freeze frame. Funny. “I believe that on the night on the debate Mitt Romney and Barack Obama switched bodies.” Dirty word. Bad.

Long Island Media: This is funny. Hey, Cecily Strong! “Okay, who has a grandfather who choked on a meatball (unintelligible)?” Everyone raises their hand. Swear word. Bad. She’s talking to a squirrell! This is good. A

To Mars!: Swear word. Bad. Racist joke. Bad. What’s going on??? I’m reminded of MacGruber for some reason. Bobby Moynihan is funny, but confusing in this sketch. I’m confused. So he’s obsessed with his cat. What’s wrong with that? Swear word. Bad. Ha brought the cat!!!!!!! That’s hilarious! “He’s been in the duffel bag the wh0le time…OH MY GOD!” “He’s all dried up!” Yay! The real cat. B-.

Musical Performance No. 1: Okay, I like the beat. I like this. I’m not really paying attention to the singing, because I can’t tell the difference between good and bad singing. Okay, as far as I know, the lyrics are not dirty. Good. I like the guitar. It’s over. That was sudden. I liked that. A-

*Side Note: Promo for a Muse concert in the commercials. Hey, maybe THAT’S why they performed.

Weekend Update: “Well, you have to hand it to Mitt Romney. Barack Obama sure did.” Yup. Opening to the debate. Yup. Bird Bird. Ha.. “Mitt is an excellent Muppet name.” I like the Sesame Street jokes.Cool! A segment. “Winners and Losers.” Dirty joke. “I think we can report this one exactly as it happened.” Big Bird again. “He has friends that already live in garbage.” Hmmm…A book by Arnold Schwartzenegger. Ha! A New Jersey joke. YES! I WAS RIGHT! BIG BIRD IS IN THE HOUSE! HA! TAKE THAT!!!!!!!! Hilarious political joke by Big Bird. Funny joke about cows. Semi-funny joke about graveyards. “I’ll take it….said a murderer.” Creepy joke about other cows. Dirty joke about a cocaine-smuggler. Funny jokes about dogs who were ‘stoned.’ An artist is coming. What was the name? Some woman who discovered Jesus in a painting or something. I like her accent. “I say, Jesus, wow, you look like a shark.” I just looked it up. Carol Spinney played Big Bird. Cool. Ha. She’s making fun of Seth Meyers. That’s a funny painting. Awww….it’s over. That was short. Oh, well. A+++

**SIDE NOTE: There’s a commercial playing that reminds me of “When You Give A Mouse A Cookie.”

A Sorry Lot We Are: Okay, a BBC parody. I like British accents. I am reminded of Mick Jagger’s accent. This is funny. They’re assuming that the Olympics will be here forever. Hey, Fred Armisen. It’s Aidy Bryant! I wonder if this will become a recurring character for her. Her evil laugh is funny. Dirty joke. Bad. This sketch is mildly funny, but bland. Ew, a dirty joke.

Carl’s New Girlfriend: Fred Armisen is acting is Regine, Carl’s girlfriend. This is funny. ‘Her’ face when Carl kisses her is funny. Reference to Syria. Another weird face. Okay, I think this is dirty. I don’t like this. This is disgusting. REALLY disgusting. F

**SIDE NOTE: Real commercial for all the Bond movies.

Musical Performance No. 2: Okay. Cut slightly due to the use of the F-Bomb. Good for the censors. Thanks. I like the guitar and the drums. B-.

Undecided Voters: Yay, another version! Okay…’s the same one. I’m not going to grade it. It’s still funny, though. N/A.

Goodnights: Yup, I was right, Chris Parnell and Big Bird made cameo appearances.

The Bad: “Construction Workers, “A Sorry Lot Are We”, and “Carl’s  New Girlfriend.”

The Good: Everything else.

Best Sketch: Tie between  cold opening, Weekend Update, and the monologue.

Worst Sketch: See “The Bad.”

Side Notes: Most of my predictions were right. Stefon, when will you appear????

Tigerboy’s Descriptions: Cold Opening: The presidents debate.

MOnologue: Daniel Craig pays tribute to his movie murder victims.

COnstruction Workers: Construction workers make dirty comments about people. Or, at least, they try to.

COmplete Bond Series: Some characters that were left out of the movies, for good reason.

A Look Back At The Obama Debate Disaster: Comments about Obama’s performance in the election are made.

Long Island Medium: A pyschic ruins people’s lives.

M.P. No. 1: Muse performs ‘Madness.’

Weekend Update: Seth McFarlane chats with Big Bird, an artist, makes fun of news stories, and names “Winners and Losers” in the debate.

A Sorry Lot Are We: To tell you the truth, I have no idea what happened.

Carl’s Girlfriend: See above.

Overall Rating: B-


4 thoughts on “Saturday Night Live Season 38, Episode 3: Daniel Craig, Muse: Debates, Big Bird, And Murder

  1. I think it was Kate McKinnon who played the medium on Long Island Media… She did have quite a few parts in the show that were hilarious. I was happy to see Big Bird on the show as well! I am really looking forward to seeing Christina Applegate this weekend. I couldn’t catch the show last night since I was working late at DISH. I set my Hopper a while back to record the entire season to the two terabyte DVR automatically. I am just happy that I can watch it when I want without having to worry about how much space I have. Hopefully Christina is funnier than Daniel Craig!

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