A Topical Spoof

Zarion: Hey, don’t go on this blog!

Tigerboy: It will rot your life.

Zarion: I’m not saying that we’re immoral, but Hades once offered to be our joke-writer.

Tigerboy: Zarion accepted.

Zarion: You want to rot your brain?

Tigerboy: Yes, yes, yes! It’ll heal anyway! (sings) Heal-ing factor…!

Zarion: FILTH! FILTH! FILTH! Let the brain-rotting commence!

24 hours later…

Zarion: I am sorry for my actions. I love my colleagues, and I did not realize how much this would hurt them.

Tigerboy: Translation: I am a lying weasel. My publicist knows all.

Zarion: Miscellaneous Soup has been-No, is one of the greatest things in my life.

Tigerboy: Translation: Money, money, money.

Zarion: I hope you all understand what I’m trying to say.

Tigerboy: Translation: Money, fame, power, mention on Saturday Night Live, cameo on Saturday Night Live, and guest hosting of Saturday Night Live, more TV roles, huge movie career.

Zarion: I hope that all of you have enjoyed our parody of the Angus T. Jones scandad.

Tigerboy: We would have made this a viral video, but we rotted the minds of our budget producers.
Zarion: Good night, and have a pleasant tomorrow. I’m Zarion Kreena, and you’re not.

Tigerboy: TRanslation: I am as funny as Chevy Chase, just without the profanity, sexism, racism, and other bad qualities.


Last Minute SNL Christmas Special Predictions

1. Adam Sandler’s Chanukah Song.

2. Jon Lovitz’s Chanukah Harry Saves Christmas.

3. Andy Samberg and Justin Timberlake’s ” (BLEEP) In The Box” Digital Short.

4. Steve Martin’s Holiday Wishes.

5. Michael Bubles’s Christmas Duets.

6.  It’s A Wonderful Live lost ending

7. Christmas For The Jews

A (Partial) Review of the SNL Christmas Special: Okay, Just The Cold Opening. More Portions Will Be Posted In Later Days

Zarion: Yeah, so, I’m really tired. You would not believe my day. Anyway, I’m just going to review the cold opening now, and copy-and paste that portion into another post, later. Eventually, you can find the full Saturday Night Live: Christmas review.

Cold Opening-“Santa’s My Boyfriend” This is a hilarious sketch. I don’t care about the dirty jokes, Amy Poehler, Maya Rudolph, and Kristen Wiig are hilarious. Swear word. Bad. Still funny, because they’re referring to Mrs. Clause. “Oh live, oh live, from New York, it’s Saturday Night.”

Zarion: There. I said “just the opening”, and I meant it.


Saturday Night Live Christmas Special Predictions

1. “Christmas Is Number One”, with Jimmy Fallon, Tracy Morgan, Chris Kattan, and Horatio Sanz.

2. Some clips from Jimmy Fallon’s recent hosting stint.

3. Unfortunately, Alec Baldwin’s “Schweddy Balls” sketch.

4. Fortunately, some Stefon.

5. Unfortunately, Fred Armisen and Kristen Wiig’s “Garth and Cat” segment.

6. A sprinkling of clips from the eighties.


Saturday Night Live News

Happy holidays, everyone!

December 15th, 2012:

Host: Martin Short

Why He’s Hosting: I am not sure. He’s hosting Canada’s Got Talent, but I don’t think that’s the reason. The “Anyone Can Host” contest? Just because? One-man show?

Musical Guest: Paul McCartney

Why He’s Playing: No idea.

Anyway, a FORMER SNL CAST MEMBER, is hosting the Christmas show, JUST LIKE LAST SEASON. (SOme guy you’ve never heard of, called Jimmy Fallon.) I predict multiple cameos, and some Ed Grimley. Perhaps, a touch of Jerry Lewis? (Martin can do an impression of him.) Perhaps the real Jerry Lewis? I can’t wait! Goal Numero Uno for the new season- Former cast member hosts! Check! See you next week for Jamie Foxx’s review, and see you the week after THAT for Martin Short’s review!


Miscellaneous Soup’s Final iCarly Review: iGoodbye (SPOILER ALERT)

Show: iCarly

Plot: Carly wants to go to a dance with her dad. Freddie has a new phone.

What I Want To See: Actual humor. No stupid jokes. No offensive jokes. (Cough, cough: Jamacian Laser Tag, cough, cough) However, the episode “iBust A Thief” is giving me some hope. The montage and Chuck E. Cheese parodies are funny. Then again, seeing the obnoxious slow motion scene, maybe not. I believe that the alleged ‘magic dolphin’ is a parody of Puff the Magic Dragon.

What I’m Dreading: Inevitable shipping, bad jokes, overused Mary Tyler Moore Show reference.

Part One: It’s time. Hmmm, the title just appeared. Let’s hope there’s no theme song. Okay, it starts at school. Weird itching comments. Okay, a homemade back-scratcher. This seems weird. Okay, there’s nails in his back. Should I laugh? They’re laughing at the phone. I have just realized that this is making fun of a real phone called a Samsung. So, I will rate that ‘Eh.’ Blah, blah, blah. Adults being insulted. They have no respect for teachers, similar to Disney Channel’s live-action shows. I really hate laugh tracks. Ewwww! Combination dirty joke/reference to first episode. (Why did I have to watch the series premiere before this?) Really, this is a kid’s show. Shouldn’t something that’s rated G be a little more appropriate? Hmmm..rare information on Carly’s Air Force dad.

Theme Song: Wait, no. THe theme song is coming. For those of you who didn’t watch closely (or pause it by coincidence on a DVR), the word ‘iGoodbye’ is being typed, instead of the usual “iCarly.” I like the way that the fireworks are used in the theme song. Yeah, yeah, blah, blah. Singing. Holy Ponypants. They even managed to put references to previous episodes in the theme song. Sort of a “Best of/Remember This?” montage. I like montages.)

Part Two: Establishing shot of building. MOtorcycle building. Weird greetings. Screaming. Socko. Ryder. Previous traditions of the show. Stupid cheering when character’s appear. Bad jokes. Insults. Yelling. Ran over girlfriends? Weird. Funny, slightly, if it hadn’t been mentioned already. P.F. Chang’s parody. Rudeness. Reference to the plastic head in the pawn shop episode. Possible insult to Judaism. (Jewish action figures?????? I feel like that was an insult, even though the show’s creator, Dan Schneider, is Jewish.) Weird comments about people and hamburgers. Reference to Spencer being at law school. The bad doorman, Lewbert, reappearing. I actually think that he’s funny. His actor should be on Saturday Night Live. I predict that his actor has had ties with comedy shows. Weird smiles. “Aw, who’s getting all elderly?” said in a weird voice. Mildly offensive. SOmething evidently meant to be touching, and it succeeded. Annoying laugh track. Funny moment from Lewbert.

Part Three: I like this song. “The Joke Is On You.” It was played during the prank montage in the “IGet Pranky” episode. Ah, montages. Ewww, weird store and callback to previous episodes. Jerry Trainor is good at playing a sick person. This is really funny. Climbing into the refrigerator. That’s funny. Cool, a new set for the show. More insults to the Samsung Gemini Maxpad. More random Spanish. The explanation was interrupted. HAHAHHAHAHA! A weasel is in the store. Annoying phrase. “I’m required by law to warn you that this machine could be dangerous and blah and blah and blah.” That’s funny. Cool special effects. Spencer sounds like he’s dying. I like the minor improvision by Spencer in the first scene where he’s sick. What language is he speaking???? Okay, someone having a purse. It’s been done on Seinfeld. The store’s owner seems creepy. I feel like I recognize him for some reason. He looks like Horatio Sanz, former Saturday Night Live cast member. Insult to wife. Sam’s stealing things. Okay, Gibby’s head is stuck. Mildly predictable. Freddie’s mom comes. Funny. Weasel jokes. Hilarious. Ever since I started reading Dilbert, the word ‘weasel’ has made me laugh. Annoying applause from the laugh track. The fancy socks return.

**NOTE: I’m reading Dan Schneider’s Fun Facts (I will post a link later), and the person Freddie’s mom was talking to was his wife. Cool!

Part Four: Crying, crying, crying. Weird jokes. More applause. COMPLETELY unnecessary. Funny jokes with Gibby having his head stuck. The background yelling is amusing. WAIT! HOLD EVERYTHING! Ladies, gentlemen, and Miscellaneous Soup readers (just a joke- please don’t unsubscribe- I need all the people I can get)! The inevitable shipping conclusions has begun. At least Dan Schneider waited until the middle to show it. Who thinks that an extended version of this will be aired soon? Anyway, on with the episode, and the review. Blah, blah, blah. Okay, they’re done. I like the fact that Dan Schneider was just teasing us. People will not like that, but I do. YAY! Explosions! Machine things! Sorry. I’m hyper. Ew, dirty joke. Slightly necessary/appropriate applause for the fixed motorcycle. THIRD annoying use of Sam refering to herself as “Mama.” Okay, the motorcycle was not necessary. “Yeah, baby- You should put that wrench down.” Sam’s getting the motorcycle. Predictable. And, I am NOT crying. Face it, if the final pages of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows didn’t make me cry, this doesn’t stand a pretzel’s chance with me. HAHAHA! The motorcycle is being ridden in the house. I am not actually laughing out loud, by the way. It takes something hilarious (hint: second presidential debate SNL parody/The Three Stooges movie) to make me laugh out loud. Gibby is free, yay. More insults to the weasel. Prediction: Gibby will keep the weasel, and it will show up/be mentioned  in the proposed spin-off relating to him. (Spare me.) Gibby wants the weasel? My prediction came true! THis show is predictable, but it can be funny. on occasion. Why did that weasel comment sound dirty? Stupid laugh track. Enough with the crying!!!! And, Carly’s dad comes in through the doorway, as spoiled by the promos. However, they only mentioned him, not showing his face. Let’s check Dan’s Fun Facts to see who plays him. According to the Facts, he’s played by David Chism. Okay, a stupid joke. BOOO. Reference to a previous episode, with First Lady Michelle Obama guest-starring. (iMeet The First Lady.) 

Part Five: Fun hat party, just like at the end of the first episode. ALso, Sam is wearing a hamburger hat that looks exactly like mine. I also have a hat that looks vaguely like Freddie’s. Reference to spaghetti tacos. Hmmm…Carly is considering living with her dad. Reference to Sam’s multiple dads. (Creepy for a kid’s show.) Yup, I predicted this. An episode of iCarly with Carly’s dad. I saw that coming. Baby Spencer, an amusing recurring sketch. “Oh my god, this freaks me out. You know I paid to keep this kid through law school.” This is hilarious! Great… Cowboy and Idiot Farm GIrl. I’ve always liked (read: hated) this sketch. And, yes, I do think that the statements at the end of the final iCarly are meant to be (sort of) what the creators and actors want to say to the fans. Butter sock reference. And, NO, I am not crying. As far as I know, Bambi didn’t even make me cry. The phrase “man-child” makes me laugh. Cool! The tears were real. Weasel reference. Great, stupid laugh track and relationship things. But, as the Fun Facts say, that doesn’t necessarily mean that a relationship will occur, unless a reunion happens. (Actually, I think that has a good chance of happening. After all, Wizards of Waverly Place is making one.) Lawyer jokes. Funny. Wow, Jennete McCurdy (Sam’s actor) really is crying. (Thanks, Fun Facts!) Great….the overused Mary Tyler Moore reference that I mentioned earlier. Awwww, Sam’s giving Carly the sound effects box. Random dancing reference. Fun Fact: When Miranda Cosgrove appeared on Late Night With Jimmy Fallon, she officially retired the dancing. Lewbert appears. The plane leaves. That reminds me of the final scenes of The Office episode “Goodbye, Michael.” Flashback, sort of. I’m happy that they’re not overusing the flashbacks, until this scene, dissimilar to the amusing April Fool’s episode, iApril Fool’s. This is sad. Squirrel camera. Interesting. Hooray! One more thing catches on fire! Poor squirrel camera…Sam’s riding her motorcycle, more iCarly clips, dancing, pie, etc. I really liked that.

Final Conclusions: Hardly any shipping, which makes me happy. Nice tributes, and callbacks. Funny jokes. INCREDIBLY sweet ending montage. I give this an A.


Tobuscus’s LITERAL Iron Man 3 Trailer