GoogleWhacking!


I once read a book that used the phrase “Googlewhacking.” Googlewhacking is where you Google something, and only one hit comes up. Ladies and gentlemen, I HAVE JUST GOOGLEWHACKED! Why was I Googling that particular phrase, you ask? Well, I typed in “Batman” and some random gibberish. I slowly changed it, until it formed things that Google could translate into actual words.

https://www.google.com/#sclient=psy-ab&hl=en&q=batman+%22laugh%2C+town%2C+laugh%22+boxing+monk+47+b&oq=batman+%22laugh%2C+town%2C+laugh%22+boxing+monk+47+b&gs_l=hp.3…6317.6317.1.6637.1.1.0.0.0.0.0.0..0.0.les%3B..0.0…1c.1.5.psy-ab.WkiA2GJ7JN4&pbx=1&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.&bvm=bv.43148975,d.aWc&fp=9f7120669b2403e2&biw=1366&bih=651

Saturday Night Live Promos And Predictions: Kevin Hart, Macklemore and Ryan Lewis


Promos:

http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/snl-promo-kevin-hart/n33295/

Predictions:

-STEFON!!!!!!

-More Louis C.K. style humor. (aka inappropriate and unamusing)

-Horse meat scandal.

-North Korea?

Miscellaneous Night Live- 800th Post Spectacular: FEATURING “Feed Me Maybe”, Some Hobo, and A Game Show!


Feed Me Maybe –Sung to the tune of “Call Me Maybe” (Apologies to Carly Rae Jepsen)

I took one look in my bowl

There was nothing to eat

I looked in your eyes

And started to beg

I just want kibble in my dish

Maybe a chocolate bone

You take the bag out,

in response to my pleading eyes

The food looked golden

Ripped bag, munchies were spillin’

Run, eat, gobble all of it up

Where you think you’re going, foody?

Hey, listen, I just ate food

And this is crazy

But I’m still hungry

So feed me maybe?

It’s hard to think straight

I’m so hungry

So here’s my food bowl

Feed me maybe?

Yes, I already ate my food,

But I’m still hungry

Growing puppy

So feed me maybe

You started eating some cheese

And a bit started to fall

I ate it up

And searched for more

I beg and whine for a meal

Sniff at the floor like it’s veal

I didn’t think I would find anything

But I’m still looking

Your bag was tearin’

Ripped bag, cheese was spillin’

Time to eat-Wait,

why are you dragging me away?

Hey, I just ate food,

and this is crazy

But I’m sleepy

So..Kennel, maybe?

Some Hobo’s Game Show

Some Hobo: Hello, I’m Some Hobo! It’s time (hacking noise) to play WAchOOOOAGOOOAAA…..Sorry. It’s time to (stink lines) play-

(Zarion Kreena and Tigerboy shove him out of the way.)

Zarion: We’ve had Wheel of Dynamite.

Tigerboy: Modeo.

Zarion: Name that Nerd!

Tigerboy: Now….Who Wants To Leave This Game Show Alive?

(The contestants awkwardly raise their hands.)

Zarion: No, that’s the name of the game show. Our guest today is none other than…Barney!

Barney: Hi, everyone! I’m your friend!

Tigerboy: Hi, ‘friend.’ Welcome to your doom.

Barney: Awww, a kitty.

Tigerboy: WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?

Barney: (forcibly hugs Tigerboy) PETS ARE CUTE! LaLALALALALALLA!

Tigerboy: Help…ack..me….

Zarion: Okay, that’s enough, Purplebrain. Get into your cage.

(Barney gets into a cattle prod-laced cage.)

Barney: The pain! The pain! Wahaaahhaha!

Zarion: Okay, time to meet the contestants. Contestant number one is Bob the Eyeball!

Bob: I’m a floating eyeball. Don’t ask.

Zarion Kreena: The second contestant is…..SOME HOBO!

Some Hobo: Yeah, now I have more than *HACK* a cameo!

Zarion: And our third contestant is SPECIAL GUEST STAR…..ghost of Stinkerbelch!

Stinkerbelch: I hate you.

Zarion: Lovely. Now, all of you have five minutes to think of the meanest insult possible. It will be measured in cruelty by this electric chair, that Tigerboy will sit in.

Tigerboy: What now?

Zarion: BEGIN! While you think, we’ll mark the five minutes by mildly zapping Tigerboy.

Tigerboy: Hey-OW! I think that-OW! This might be a bad idea…OW! That’s not mild by any stretch of the imagination!

Zarion: Time is UP!

Tigerboy: Oww…..

Zarion: Bob, what did you come up with?

Bob the Eyeball: Blarney.

Zarion: And the chair says…

Tigerboy: Ow…Okay, it’s registering at a ‘mildly annoying, but mostly cliche.

Zarion: Some Hobo?

Some Hobo: *SNEEZE, SNARF* Purple Postule! Hack…

Tigerboy: OW! It’s a ‘Tsk, tsk.’

Zarion: We have some real wimps here. Stinkerbelch?

Stinkerbelch: Spawn of Satan!

Zarion: Wow…Just, wow…That’s Barney’s nickname?

Stinkerbelch: No, that’s your nickname. Barney’s is “Not Educational.”

Zarion: More of a judgement, but, eh.  Tigerboy?

Tigerboy: It’s a “You monster!” Stinkerbelch wins. VULTURES!

Vulture No. 1: (caws)

Vulture No. 2: (caws)

Zarion: Tear them to shreds, my pretties.

(Bob and Some Hobo run.)

Zarion: Stinkerbelch? How should Barney be killed?

Stinkerbelch: Torn in half and ripped apart/drooled on by screaming children.

Zarion: Perfectly ironic! That’s our 800th post, good night! Have a pleasant tomorrow!

Tigerboy: Happy Wednesday!

Saturday Night Live Review/Recap- Season 38, Episode 14- Christopher Waltz (HOST), Alabama Shakes (MUSICAL GUEST): FEATURING Dimitri’s Disturbing Valentines, Cruise Ship Mayhem, Papal Securities, and What Have YOU Become: A Game Show.


Zarion Kreena: Welcome to another review! I ramble, and provide cohesive reviews.

Tigerboy: I give descriptions.

Host: Christopher Waltz

Why He’s Hosting: Most likely, his role in Django Unchained.

Musical Guest: The Alabama Shakes

Why They Are Playing: Not quite sure. Their song in Silver Linings Playbook, perhaps?

Cold Opening– “Carnival Cruise Ship Accident”

-“Rambling Guy:” Okay, I don’t think this is a good thing to make fun of. We start with Cecily Strong and Jason Sudeikis. “Doesn’t mean we can’t have some fun!” A comedian..Okay, Jay Pharoah is playing him! Cool, he’s doing his Chris Rock imitation. “There’s dookies on the wall, man!” I still think this sketch is too soon. “There is no God!” Wow, Jay..”The Pope resigned…Oh, lord.” Their reactions to the news make me laugh. “It says here that no, no….” HAHAHAHAH! “That is about US!” A mentalist? I was right! Bill Hader! Tim Robinson appears as a volunteer. HAHHAAHAHAHHAAH! “I’m back on this God-forsaken boat! Make me the chicken again!” Designating areas as toilets? Poor karoake. I’m not going to be eating that sushi. Dan? I predict Moynihan. I WAS RIGHT! “Who ate Koko? Why would someone do this? We still have food!” “Spell out the words ‘KILL US'”!!!! Michael Jackson impression? Yay for Fred! Wow…that was creepy. That was good. A

-Regular Review: I think, personally, that it’s too soon to make a parody of this, but they did. At least it was humorous. I could have hoped for some State of the Union humor, though. Still, as least we still got some Jay Pharoah. Surprisingly good sketch.

-Tigerboy’s Description: Cruise ship hosts run out of entertainment ideas while stranded in the ocean. (It’s better than how I described it.)

Monologue:

-“Rambling Guy”: I hope this is as good as the cold opening. He really does look like Fred Armisen. “You don’t have a sense of humor. You’re a serious German actor.” Cool! First German-speaking host! I predict Mike Myers as Dieter, making a cameo! HAHAHAH! Bobby and Kate! They’re funny. A version of “Who’s on First” with bratwurst. Casual Hitler? NO! NO! That doesn’t make me laugh. Great..singing. Hopefully this is will be good. “Smile, D**n You, Smile!” I heard the Joker saying a version of this. Cool, the cast is joining him! Does anyone see Seth Meyers? He’s a pretty good singer. B+

-Regular Review: THis was pretty funny. THere was singing, and it did not annoy me.

-Tigerboy’s Description: Christopher Waltz talks about Austrian stereotypes, and sings.

**NOTE: I’M WATCHING A CAR COMMERCIAL WITH PAST PRESIDENTS SINGING. TSK, TSK.

What Have YOU Become?: Great! I like game shows! Waltz is the host. What game show is this? “And now I have the highest score in Space Invaders in all of Alabama!” Hader is a contestant. I predict Aidy will be the third one. I was right! Cool! Bill is usually the go-to game show host. Oh, yeah, this is going to be good. Poor Donald. “I love space..I could have been an astronaut.”  “I tell her one of my daughters is in the bathroom, but I don’t have a daughter.” Aidy won! “Quick follow-up: Are you happy?” I guess you can’t have it both ways. HAHAHAAH! “Each of your oldest living relatives!” Jay is hilarious!!! Poor, poor Patrick. Yes, the tables are being turned! “No, boy, you’ve got to go to game show school.” A

-Regular Review: Best game show of the season.

-Tigerboy’s Description: This game show plays sadistic mind games. Now, what have YOU become, reading this review?

Papal Securites:

“Rambling Guy”: The Pope? Commercial parody? This looks good! Papal Securities? HAAHAHAHAHH! This is hilarious! I think Christopher is playing the host. Whoever it is, he’s doing a great job! “Helping popes retire since the last time it happened. In 1450.” A

-Regular Review: Hilarious.

-Tigerboy’s Description: THe perfect system for your Pope’s needs.

Tifi the Conversation Hijacker:

-“Rambling Guy”: Hmm…A building. Murder mystery? Who’s the person in the pink dress? I feel like she’s appeared before. Oh, her name is Tifi. Ewww…”Uh, oh..Where’s this goin’?” She seems like That Girl At That Party You Started A Conversation With, but more like a conversation hijacker. Racist joke.. Bad. I don’t know why this is funny. “And the bed was gone?” Ewww…..Racist joke. Bad. “Like a piano’s going to fall on me or something?” D-

-Regular Review: Bad sketch. If you don’t get the joke, the whole thing falls apart.

-Tigerboy’s Description: No idea what this mess was.

Movie Trailer: Djesus UnCrossed:

-“Rambling Guy”: Okay, I feel nervous. R-rated movie parody. Huh? Jesus Uncrossed? THis is funny. “And he’s preaching anything but forgiveness.” That’s a lot of fake blood. Now they’re making fun of Samuel L. Jackson. I can see this as a real movie. I can also see that some people would hate this. “A less violent Passion of the Christ.” B+

-Regular Review: I can see how this sketch might offend a lot of people of the Christian faith, but I find it funny. I’m not sure why, but it makes me laugh. Still, I would not see this movie. I don’t like bloody movies.

-Tigerboy’s Description: Jesus Christ comes back from the dead for REVENGE!

Jamarcus’ Songs:

-“Rambling Guy”: What’s this? Ewwww….It looks like a live commercial parody. This doesn’t seem funny. I don’t like this. F

-Regular Review: A creepy, disgusting sketch.

-Tigerboy’s Description: The Jamarcus brothers attempt to sell a…special CD. I do not recommend this.

Musical Performance #1:

-“Rambling Guy”: I really hope that they have the banjo. They looked nervous in the bumper shot. Okay, I like the drum set. I like the guitar. I think I detect a whiff of banjo. Something tells me they will appear in a sketch. Okay, let’s see what they’re playing. I can’t really hear her singing, so I can’t rate it. Still, I think she’s doing a great job. Okay, they are playing “Hold On.” From what I can tell, the lyrics are appropriate. A

-Regular Review: Good music. Good singing. Appropriate lyrics.

-Tigerboy’s Description: The Alabama Shakes play “Hold On.”

Weekend Update With Seth Meyers:

-“Rambling Guy”: Prediction: Pope and State of the Union jokes. Yup, it starts with the Union. Funny opening statement. “And then John Boehner rolled his eyes so hard he saw his brain.” HAHHAA! Funny Colorado joke. Funny cruise ship joke. Funny joke about the Chuck Haegel debates. Yup, the Marco Rubio drink of water thing. Just as I thought, Taran Killam is playing him. Now, GET STEFON ON!! “You eat a whole bag of roasted peanuts and beef jerky.” This is amusing. “Tiniest bottle of water everyone’s ever seen.” Water is getting a lot of content in the news, from the Vice Presidential Debate with Paul Ryan to this. Coincidentally, both were played by Taran Killam. This is hilarious! His voice sounds like a bat! Seth Meyers is hiding the water deliberately. Don’t put the water back! “And now I have to pee.” The dog show! Ewww…Creepy joke about that. Confusing joke about workplace dating. Amusing postcard joke. “So it looks like he might be finally picked up from camp.” “Mohawk and Bangs.” Meteorite joke. “…Vladimir Putin‘s origin story.” Olya Povlatsky? Not Stefon? Come on! I predict no Stefon for the episode. “Take me away from this barren wasteland.” “You’re only 18?” “We just got Who Let the Dogs Out?” “Oh, thank God. Now I will die of the rabies.” Poor dog. Funny teddy bear joke. Ewwww…..Creepy French joke. “Followed by the most horrifying thing you’ll ever see.” Bizarre joke about Cocoa Puffs. Stephen A. SMith? Okay, I’m SURE that Stefon isn’t going to appear. COME ON! It was just a holiday! President’s Day is coming! This is amusing, so far. Vacation on your forehead??? Ewwww…..”You are having an imaginary conversation.” I don’t even know who Kobe Bryant is. B+

-Regular Review: Overall, funny.

-Tigerboy’s Description: Seth Meyers lampoons the news, and talks with Marco Rubio, Olya Povlatsky, and Stephan A. Smith.

**NOTE: I SAW TIM ROBINSON IN THE SCREENSHOT OF THEM SETTING UP. IT LOOKS LIKE HE’S GOING TO APPEAR AGAIN.

Regine Returns!:

-“Rambling Guy”: This reminds me of “Song Memories.” Oh, great….Fred Armisen dressing up as a girl. I remember this sketch. I’m not laughing. Okay, found it. Fred Armisen is playing Regine, who first appeared in the “Daniel Craig/Muse” episode. He broke character. Relatively amusing. F

-Regular Review: This sketch has gone on for way too long. It’s never made me laugh.

-Tigerboy’s Description: Regine is back. Boo!

Fox And Friends:

-“Rambling Guy”: Okay, I have to admit, I’m getting tired of this sketch. Finally, the State of the Union. “What, he didn’t wear pants?” “There was a bee in my apartment, and it turned into this whole thing.” Weird reversed clip of Barack Obama. At least that was Jay Pharoah. Eww..”And saying the name out loud, it’s pretty obvious that was a prank.” Bill Hader is Ted Nugent. “My favorite p-word is ‘pasketti!'” Ewww..When I’m done with the episode, I’ll list the whole sequence of mistakes. “My goatee was full of ticks.” This is trying to say that Ted Nugent is crazy. I find that funny. Huh? Horse meat? “One time in fourth grade, I ate a sea horse. They still won’t let me into that aquarium.” “Poop out glue.” Okay, that’s Fred Armisen. Where’s Waltz? Wait, maybe that is Waltz. “Brian, I think you just went to Olive Garden.” “….never, never leave the United States.” IHOP reference. Hey, I’m going there tomorrow. “I guess I just ate my passport.” A

-Regular Review: I like satire. ‘Nuff said.

-Tigerboy’s Description: More Fox biased news and hilarity.

Musical Performance #2:

-“Rambling Guy”: I don’t know what just happened. It showed a screenshot, but then real commercial appeared. Is the song being censored? Never mind. It started. I hear the banjo. I like the music. Okay, they are playing “Always Alright.” C-

-Regular Review: Good singing? Check. Good music? Check. Appropriate lyrics? NO.

-Tigerboy’s Description: The Alabama Shakes played “Always Alright.”

Creepy Valentines From Dimitri:

-“Rambling Guy”: Okay, this looks like a hotel. Weird valentine. “I am a person who is closer than you think.” This is funny. It’s obvious that Christopher Waltz is playing Dimitri, the person. He’s doing the obligatory “creepy person” sketch. Bill Hader is funny. “You are perfect. I am your mother. Ha, ha, ha. No.” Ewww..Poor Dimitri. Ewwww….His voice reminds me of Gru’s from Despicable Me. Another letter? Ewww..Kenan’s shocked face has become a trademark. B

-Regular Review: SImple, yet amusing. Reminscent of Seinfeld.

-Tigerboy’s Description: Dmitri inadvertently scares his crush.

Goodnights:

-“Rambling Guy”: I always enjoy the closing music, even if it does mean that the episode is ending.

-Regular Review: N/A

-Tigerboy’s Description: N/A

Closing Comments: Pretty solid episode. Some bad sketches. Stefon should have appeared.

Best Sketch: “Cruise Ship Cold Opening”

Worst Sketch: “Regine”

Best Commercial Parody: “Papal Security”

Worst Commercial Parody: N/A. No bad commercial parodies.

Overall Rating: C+

Full List of “Fox And Friends” Corrections:

-At no point did our military fight a war against Cobra.

-The “T” in B.L.T. does not stand for “terrorism.”

-Meteors are not coming to take your guns.

-It is n0t Roe vs Dwayne Wade.

-Zero Dark Thirty is not a diet soda.

-The Vatican is not accessible through a wardrobe.

-Food stamps are not used to mail food.

-Armadillo is not Spanish for “arms dealer.”

-Navy Seals are not actual seals with laser beams on their heads.

-“That’s not a knife, this is a knife” is not the Australian national anthem.

-At no point did the passengers on the Carnival Cruise become zombies.

-Beyonce can not hypnotize animals.

-“Adele” is a singer. “A Dell” is a computer.

-February is a month.

-Marco Rubio did not bring pasta back from China.

-The Staten Island Ferry will not give you money for teeth.

-The real Abraham Lincoln lived longer than three hours.

-More people died from gun violence last year than from walking into elevator shafts.

-The Constitution did not “write itself.”

-Bruno Mars is from Earth.

-There are no Americans in the Bible.

-The tie goes to the runner.

-Not all amputees kill their girlfriends.

-Zumba is not a secret form of Santeria.

-North Korea is not a Cloud City.

-A “pin code” and a “pine cone” are two different things.

-The kid on Modern Family did not start out in p**n.

-Joe Biden’s teeth are real and do not pick up radio waves.

-Polar bears are rarely “asking for it.”

-Kobe beef is not beef from the flesh of Kobe Bryant.

-A “period piece” is not a movie that only plays during one week of the month.

-Plants are alive, but they cannot watch TV.

-A transgender is not a car that can be driven by men and women.

-Kate Upton is not dating a glacier.

-God does not sneeze electricity.

-The similar names of North Dakota and South Dakota are not a coincidence.

-Even black people love Raymond.

-Mumford’s daughtes are not in foster care.

Belated Saturday Night Live Promos And Predictions: Christopher Waltz, Alabama Shakers!


Promos:

http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/snl-promo-christoph-waltz/n32686/

Predictions:

-Stefon.

-State of the Union.

-No more mail on Saturdays, starting in August.

-Someone from Django Unchained will make a cameo.

-The Oscars will be mentioned.

-There will be a joke about the physical similarities between Fred Armisen and Christopher Waltz.

-There will be a joke on how Waltz’s last name is the name of  the waltz.

Review: 30 Rock, Season Seven, Episodes 12/13: “Hogcock!”/”Last Lunch!”m *MINOR SPOILERS*


I have watched the episodes multiple times in my free time, ensuring my ability to catch all of the little jokes. There’s Jenna Maroney looking into the camera, saying she never met Mickey Rourke. There’s Jack Donaghy, saying that he has vanquished Alec Baldwin. Liz Lemon’s bizarre internet flame war with her husband. Kenneth’s list of “No-No” words, which includes “immortal being”, “show within a show'”, and more. All I can truly say is that this was a fitting finale, Lutz should have eaten at Plumpies, and that I wish Rachel Dratch had made an appearance. (Or that there was a meta-joke referencing the unaired pilot) A

Saturday Night Live Review/Recap- Season 38, Episode 13- Justin Bieber (Host, Musical Guest): FEATURING Justin Bieber Body Doubles, The Californians, The Miley Cyrus Show, and Booker T. Washington High School’s Valentine’s Day Abstinence Dance!


Zarion Kreena: I’m Zarion!

Tigerboy: And I’m Tigerboy!

Zarion: Welcome to a HORRIBLE episode of Saturday Night Live!

Tigerboy: Hey, don’t be biased!

Zarion: I hate Justin Bieber!

Tigerboy: I don’t care. Be patient. The writers will make fun of him.

Zarion: Okay….I’ll only be biased on the musical performances. Deal?

Tigerboy: Deal!

Zarion Kreena: Besides, the Weekend Update is, for the most part, funny. We have a great review for you tonight! I’m here, doing my “Rambling Guy” reviews and “Regular Reviews!”

Tigerboy: And I’m here, giving bad descriptions! But, I’m getting better.

Zarion Kreena: Quick predictions. Jay Pharoah will play Barack Obama, and they will make fun of Justin Bieber mispelling Lorne Michael’s name on an instagram, whatever that is. I have only seen it in the articles. Oh, well. On with the review!

Host: Justin Bieber

Note: I will set aside my bias for him, just as I set aside my Seth McFarlane bias. Let’s hope this episode is better.

Why He’s Hosting: His new album, Believe Acoustic.

Note: I am not a fan of him. I only know it from this article. http://www.billboard.com/news/justin-bieber-hosting-performing-on-snl-1008075242.story#/news/justin-bieber-hosting-performing-on-snl-1008075242.story

Musical Guest: Justin Bieber

Why He’s Playing: See above.

Cold Opening– “Super Bowl Live At CBS”

-“Rambling Guy”: Cool! Kenan Thompson is James Brown! Yes, the power outage. “I can’t watch those again.” “I’m running on fumes, man.” Funny product placement. Tim Robinson is making a rare appearance. Jay Pharoah is funny. The green screen is obvious. Did they just say “ate him?” “The research team has just handed me anagrams of the players’ names.” “Cocaine kelp rink.” Clever. I like anagrams. Ewww……What commercial is that? Kenan’s reaction is funny! HAAHAHAHHAHHA! “…ran out of proper commercials” “Do we stop aging?” This is a relatively good sketch. Made it up? HAHAAHHAHHAHA! “Back to you” paradoxes! “This is a new world now.” I don’t care about Two Broke Girls. Ray Lewis murder trial mention..The lights are back! “I really need to leave before Ray is back…” B+

-Tigerboy’s Description: News commenters try to find something to do during the power outage.

-Regular Review: Pretty good sketch. The wh0le thing wasn’t funny, but the majority made me laugh. The writers were very creative with the acronyms. THe commercial parody was creepy.

Monologue:

-‘Rambling Guy”: PLEASE do not be singing. Two weeks in a row, I’ve had to say that. You know, they bill this as the “Valentine’s Special”, but it’s next week. Oh, well. “I had no idea there would be any girls here tonight.” Oh, no…Music…..”That romantic time of year. You know, Black History Month.” Oh, great….Yay, Kenan! Flash cards? Wow, he’s speaking to the audience. Eww…..Hey, I studied Phyllis Wheatley. “Okay, I don’t think that one’s true.” …Now he’s just lying. BOOOOO! SINGING! Ewwwww…….This monologue could be worse. WHOOPI GOLDBERG! WOOOOOOOO! Hooray for Whoopi! This could have been worse. B-

-Tigerboy’s Description: Justin Bieber awkwardly tries to combine teaching the audience about Black History Month, and woo an audience member.

-Regular Review: It wasn’t the best monologue I’ve ever seen, but it was mildly funny. Kenan and Whoopi were the best people in the monologue.

The Californians:

-“Rambling Guy”: Yes! I love this sketch! OKay…Funny way to say ‘Prius.’ HAHAHHAA! Justin Bieber is a hobo! Oh, a runaway. Not really much to say. Pretty funny. Closeups! Drama! Directions! Humor! HAHAHHAHAH! Multiple close-ups of Bill Hader’s character! B

-Tigerboy’s Description: The Californians help a runaway find his home family.

-Regular Review: The usual sketch. I’m glad they found a new way to keep it from becoming stale.

Justin Bieber Body Doubles:

-“Rambling Guy:” Okay, he’s playing himself. Who’s Steely Dan? HAHAHAHHAH! Funny body doubles of Bieber! THey don’t look like him! “Half of them are girls.” “Yeah, yeah, that’s our A-game right there.” MAJOR insult to Justin Bieber. He sounds like a girl when he’s singing! Well, so does the REAL Bieber. Oh, great. He’s singing. BOOOOOO! Okay, making fun of his dancing! Aidy Bryant! Ewww…Yay, Bobby Moynihan! It actually looks like they’re doing a real dance-off. Ewwww…..”A little gentleman by the name of Saddam Hussein!!” “He what? WHAT?” Was that a cameo? Ellen? Was that Ellen Degeneres?? Or was it Kate McKinnon playing her? B+

-Tigerboy’s Description: A security guard shows Bieber his new body doubles.

-Regular Review: A whole sketch of Bieber insults. FUNNY.

More “Real Housewives” Spinoffs:

-“Rambling Guy”: Okay, another “Real Housewives” parody. A dentist spin-off? THis seems racist. The limo driver? “Somewhere Chauffear the Rainbow?” Eww..HOUSEPLANTS?? HHAHAHAHAHAHA! SUNDAYS FOR ONE MINUTE??? ..Swear words…Dirty things…BAD. “Wait, didn’t we do that one already?” C+

-Tigerboy’s Description: More spinoffs are shown.

-Regular Review: Eh. Could have been better.

Musical Performance:

-“Rambling Guy”: Prediction: Whoopi Goldberg will announce either this one or the next one.  I was right! Great…the guitar. YOU SING LIKE A GIRL! Okay…..Wikipedia, tell me what he’s singing so I can look up the lyrics. “As Long As You Love Me.” I can actually understand the lyrics, but I’ll look them up anyway. Singing, annoying. Music, barely tolerable. Lyrics, appropriate. C

-Tigerboy’s Description: Justin Bieber sings “As Long As You Love Me.”

-Regular Review: See “Rambling Guy.”

Weekend Update:

-“Rambling Guy”: Let’s hope this is good. Nor’Easter reference…”And worst of all, Instagram.” HAAHHAHA! “Trapped overnight’s not all that bad.” Who are they calling a drone? I do not recognize the picture. “Just cause” HAHAHAHAHAHHA! Alicia Keys? King Richard! I heard about that on CNN Student News! Cool, his two best friends.  “The power went to his head, y’know…” This segment is good, but I’m not sure how long they can keep doing it without it getting old. Poison? HAHHAHAH! “Seth, it’s kind of like how you feel about your girlfriend moving in with you.”  Madea??? In Star Wars? Honey Boo Boo jokes! “…in a custody battle.” Confusing joke. Funny joke about date surveys. Yay, Kenan! “Corey, the one black guy in college commercials!” They’re making fun of the racism of commercials. I think….”I have to give a high five every twelve seconds.”  “I die, Seth.” “One clean part of Berkeley.” I predict that this will be a recurring character. Gangnam Style reference. I don’t get the Snap-Back jokes.  The Monopoly thing! “You can be the iron, because no one’s buying a whole new game!” Funny Alabama joke. No Stefon…Awww… B

-Tigerboy’s Description: Seth Meyers cracks jokes, talks with the late King Richard’s two best friends and Corey, the one black guy in every commercial.

-Regular Review: Once again, a supremely funny Weekend Update. The guest segments were, for the most part, humorous.

West Side Story:

-“Rambling Guy”: COmputer issues, so I hope I can still do this. Forgive my mistakes. Really long bumper shot. Okay, a school. “Or a couple of regular birds in love.” This looks like a West Side Story parody. I know about West Side Story from a different parody. “Say more stuff…” “But he kept pushing on it rather than pulling.” “He doesn’t know how doors work?” Ewwww….Puppies? I don’t get it. Ewww…..”Billy thought he saw a witch, and ran, and locked himself in the car.” Ewwww….EWWWW….Idiot. “You know, I feel like I have to say something.” STOP THE SINGING! “You know I’m eleven, right?” B-

-Tigerboy’s Description: A VERY mismatched couple.

-Regular Review: Some parts were dirty, but this was amusing, for the most part. I heard the original song earlier today, at a dance.

The Miley Cyrus Show:

-“Rambling Guy”: I’m starting to fear that this post might not be posted at the usual time, because I am still having the issue. Oh, well. I can still type. OOH! I saw the list! It’s “The Miley Cyrus Show!” Maybe she had a scandal recently…Fun Fact: Miley Cyrus once was on that sketch, playing Justin Bieber. Perhaps Justin Bieber is going to return the favor. She looks different. “We’re all loving the new look.” Ewwww…EWWWW….That’s not funny, that’s just disgusting. Funny picture of her getting the tattoo. Funny tattoo. Okay, her guest is the president of some kind of fan club. I didn’t get the name. Oh, the “Miley Cyrus Fan Club.” AHHAHAHHAH! HE’S INSULTING HIMSELF! “I heard he still has his baby teeth.” The weed reference. “Yeah, me, too.” Way to promote yourself, Bieber. BOO! Billy Cyrus’s laugh is funny. A clip of her secret wedding….Yay, Taran Killam! HAAHHAHHAH! “Except for the cameras and pictures and all that…” “Wow, I can’t believe I just found out about this.” It’s over already? I’m still hoping for jokes about Justin Bieber’s drug abuse. REAL jokes. Not fake apologies. B+

-Tigerboy’s Description: Miley Cyrus invites the president of her fan club onto “The Miley Cyrus Show.”

-Regular Review: Mostly amusing.

Annoying Older Brother:

-“Rambling Guy”: Okay, a house. It looks like a first date. Prediction: As soon as the parents leave, Bieber will start smoking. Taran Killam is funny. How do you spell glice? Is it glyce or glice? Oh, well, it’s not real. “Why don’t you try out for glyce hockey?” Bad pun. “Gliceland.” Worse pun. Even though Justin Bieber is being made fun of, this could be funnier. “You fool!” Never mind. Taran Killam is hilarious. “Because I had such bad hair glice?” Swear word. Bad. Ewww…..Self-promotion!!!! BOOOOO!!! I hope Bieber breaks character from Taran Killam’s hilarious-ness. Did he just mention a bat? “I’m messing with you, Papa.” B

-Tigerboy’s Description: An older brother annoys his sister’s date.

And Now,  A ***y Message From Justin Bieber:

-“Rambling Guy”: Ewwww…..Okay, this is going to be disgusting. This is pre-recorded. Ewwwwww……….I was right. This is disgusting. Bobby Moynihan is funny, though. Ewwwwww….Hillary Clinton?? Swear word. Bad. EWWWWWW…..Ultrasound gel? Taco has a toilet? D

-Tigerboy’s Description: Justin Bieber attempts to woo fans with a video, but is interrupted by his roommate, Taco.

-Regular Review: Disgusting, but Bobby Moynihan was funny.

Musical Performance 2:

-“Rambling Guy”: This time, Jason Sudeikis introduced it. Annoying singing. Weird lyrics. Bad playing. Who’s on the piano, in the background? He sang “Nothing Like Us.” Annoying lyrics. The episode is almost over. I hope that there will be another sketch, and not a song during the Goodnights. Sadly, that has happened before. Okay, it’s over. Bumper shot, so the episode might be ending. C-

-Tigerboy’s Description: Justin Bieber sings “Nothing Like Us.”

-Regular Review: See “Rambling Guy.”

Booker T. Washington High School’s Valentine’s Abstinence Dance:

-“Rambling Guy”: YEAH! Booker T. Washington High! I thought earlier that this might come, but I never put in the predictions. Man-diaper? HOBO WITH A CROSSBOW?? Jay Pharoah is hilarious. I find Justin Bieber’s impression of a head of a club very offensive. He’s portraying them as nerds. SELF-PROMOTION! HAHAHAAHA…..Frogs and turtles! Ewwww….Wager? VENTROLOQUIST PUPPET AS A DATE??? It’s foulmouthed? It must be Slappy, the living dummy from the Goosebumps books. Chewed through a fence? “Put my head through a screen door.” Ewwwww….Yay, Kenan! Nasim Pedrad’s face is priceless. Montesula’s Grenade???? Ewwww…I’m ashamed to admit it, but the symptoms of the disease make me laugh. SOMEONE JUST GAVE BIRTH??? I’m laughing out loud right now! WIG IN THE PUNCH BOWL???? A+++++++++++

-Tigerboy’s Description: Chaos at the dance! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!

-Regular Review: Hilarious. I was ashamed that I laughed at some of the grosser jokes.

Goodnights:

-“Rambling Guy”: I was right. Whoopi Goldberg cameod.

-Tigerboy’s Description: N/A

-Regular Review: N/A

Closing Comments: Well, they could have done a better job of insulting Bieber, but it was still hilarious. Because they didn’t do it, I’m going to make a blog post featuring Bieber endorsing “Baby’s First Meth Lab!” I will write it this week.

Best Sketch: Super Bowl Live On CBS

Worst Sketch: Annoying Older Brother

Best Commercial Parody: N/A

Worst Commercial Parody: And Now, A ***Y Message From Justin Bieber

Overall Rating: B-/83%